You decide.

I was asked recently if I believed people were gay by choice or by birth.

Now I know a whole bunch of gay people, but it's the first time anyone's ever asked me that. Equally remarkable to me is that I've never thought about the difference.

And I still haven't.
I answered immediately, almost instinctively, that the difference doesn't matter.

Take talent for instance.

When we say someone is talented, we mean they are gifted - from birth - with an exceptional mastery of something. Music. Math. Drawing. Writing.
But since no gene has been found for talent, we look to the environment. Good schools, a dad who sang in the shower, crayons always at hand, and so on.

I believe people say talent is a gift when they want to feel special. After all, if you can take voice lessons or attend a writing workshop and still match someone genuinely 'talented', then being talented isn't a unique quality.

I think people who believe being gay is a product of say, not having your dad hug you enough, subconsciously want it to be a reversible, preventable thing. For similar reasons, when they find it can't be changed, they say it's something you're born with. And in the end, that's the chief motivation for the distinction.

I say we are our own tipping point.
I say we are our own x-factor.
I think people harp too much on how people start out instead of how they are now.

If you decided to take up a photography course and people liked your pictures, is it your training or is it a gift? Isn't choosing to be really good the same as being talented?

A buddy of mine once said "I might be the world's greatest fighter pilot. But I ain't never gonna know. Cos I'm not interested in flying."