Saturday, October 15, 2005

Dear all

First off, I’m sorry if I haven’t dropped by recently.
I’ve been trynna finish stuff at work before I go.

I’m taking a break at the end of next week. Just a short trip out of the country. It’s been a long time coming and considering the week I’ve just had, not a moment too soon.

I’m not one for navel-gazing mumbo jumbo, but recently I’ve felt very grateful.
Recently, stuff has happened that made me feel my life was going to worth living. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t suicidal or anything. I love my life.

But for the first time in a long while I felt it’s going to be worth sticking around for.

Some days, my medium-sized dreams get big.
Some days, my tiny projects make me so happy.
Some days, I have a genuine, un-smug smile on my face.

I know there will be days I won’t feel this way.
I’m pretty sure my cynical side will get its shots in every now and then.

But I’ve noticed a pattern:
The good days are staying longer.

I’m gonna be careful about what I put out in the Universe.
The ride I’m on has been really good so far (fingers crossed).
I’m betting the next one is gonna be perfect.

See you when I get back.

Saturday, October 08, 2005


I promised Mahi I’d do this, so here it is.
That said, I’m bad at these things. For one thing, there aren’t too many bits about me that are terribly interesting (no, really). I didn’t want to think about the answers too much cos that’d be:
a) kinda artificial
b) too much work trying to sound interesting which is kinda like point a)

That said, it took a while to do some of them cos I struggled to find enough to fill 7 items. Even mundane ones. Sad, I know.

Please don’t let that stop you from visiting in the future.

Seven Things That Scare Me
  1. Losing a loved one.
  2. Crows.
  3. Being mediocre.
  4. Clowns.
  5. Mosquitoes. I became a bit paranoid cos we've had some dengue fever scares in the neighbourhood. Every time I see one sucking on me I slap frantically, not killing the cursed insect and bruising myself instead.
  6. Blood tests.
  7. Ads for colleges. I do ads for a college and when we were going through the research, I saw it takes very little solid fact to convince parents to part with their life's savings. This worries me.
Seven Things I Like
  1. Reading. I have to read something before I sleep. I've read brochures for mutual funds in desperate times.
  2. Writing.
  3. Running.
  4. My iPod.
  5. Hips. A recent development. I've always been a breast man, but lately, I've begun to appreciate a woman's hips: the small patches of it that rise above jeans, the dimples at the base of the spine.
  6. My life.
  7. Kissing.
Seven Important Things In My Room
  1. My bookshelf.
  2. My bed.
  3. My clock.
  4. Hangers. The only time clothes should be on the floor is post-coital.
  5. My stand lamp.
  6. My envelopes. To sort my receipts.
  7. My air-cond.
Seven Random Facts About Me
  1. I have a shaved head.
  2. Once a month, I target someone in my building for an elevator prank.
  3. I have a dimple on one cheek.
  4. I hate wet toilet floors. With hair. Ew.
  5. If you play Boggles, we will get along.
  6. I’m militant about safety belts. An absolute Nazi.
  7. I will stay really late, but I don’t take my work home. When I’m out the door, I’m done.
Seven Things I Plan on Doing Before I Die
  1. Have at least 5 decent books to my name.
  2. Live in Toronto for a year.
  3. Make love to a beautiful, angry female welder (oh, you think I’m kidding).
  4. This one I can’t tell you.
  5. Start my own movie magazine.
  6. Be on set of whatever movie David Fincher is filming, start to finish. I’ll run around and bring him coffee. I don’t care.
  7. Make my folks proud.
Seven Things That I Can Do, or Have Done
  1. Be a good friend.
  2. Been 3 different kinds of paid writer.
  3. Make half-decent pancakes.
  4. Been in a cage with a live tiger, not 5 feet away.
  5. Shaken hands with Samuel L. Jackson. He came to Melbourne for the premiere of The Long Kiss Goodnight.
  6. Sing second voice.
  7. Slept on the streets. It was the first day of the new millennium. The roads were gridlocked, the trains wouldn’t run for another six hours, so I slept on the pavement, and then next to a water fountain.
Seven Things That I Cannot Or Will Not Do
  1. Remember roads.
  2. Whistle.
  3. Drink tequila ever again.
  4. Smoke.
  5. Work at any desk I’ve been assigned. It could be a great desk or a huge office with a plasma screen TV, a coffee machine and hot sexually liberated secretary. The moment you say “This is where you will work,” it’s over. I can’t work there.
  6. Watch American Idol.
  7. Leave twisted phone cords alone.
Seven Things I Say The Most
  1. “Fuck.”
  2. “No.”
  3. “Mkaaay…”
  4. “I’ma.” As in “I’ma go now,” or “I’ma fucking kick your ass.”
  5. “I love you.” This is every day, but it’s really only to those few people. Very few.
  6. “Babe.”
  7. “Previously on Battlestar Galactica.” This is to no one in particular. I love the show a lot and I find myself saying it when they show the re-cap. I sometimes say it during lunch at random which makes my colleagues roll their eyes.
Seven Celebs on Whom I Have A Crush

Had huge problems with this cos most of the celebs I love:
Aren’t actually big stars
Aren’t all in movies
  1. Bryce Dallas Howard. After The Village, I went through this period where I was so over sighted chicks. Blind girls don’t burden you with their prejudice. Blind chicks see the real you.
  2. Elisha Cuthbert.
  3. Jem.
  4. Laura Linney. I have been crushing on Laura since 1997. And she’s still the one for me. I would so be her kept man if she’d have me. She could teach me so many things.
  5. Katee Sackhoff. Smokes cigars, flies a Viper fighter, punches like a guy. Katee could conceivably paddle my ass.
  6. Lokelani McMichael. Her real name’s Lokelani Kuulei Make Mai which means 'Heavenly rose my precious flower lei.' At the age of 18, Lokelani became the youngest female ever to participate in the Ironman competition - the Holy Grail of Triathlon events.
  7. Kristie Lu Stout.
And Finally, Seven Souls I Have Ruined By Tagging Them

I’ma change this a bit.
I’m not gonna tag nobody.
It’s my good deed for the day.

Sunday, October 02, 2005

3 rainy days: 2001

(Rifles through glove box for the 17th time, still no house keys.)


(Puts car in gear, drives to end of street, brakes suddenly.)

Will you fucking move!

(Dog refuses to move)

MOVE you fucking-

(Leans on the horn. Dog is still there, unaffected.)

Ok, fine you wanna-

(First gear, inches forward, brakes suddenly.)

You mangy FUCK!

(Car is like, six inches from the dog. I’m freaked out, dog is not.)


(Backs car up slightly, drives around fucking mangy dog. Parks at the end of the street.)

(Calls mom, she answers.)

Mom: Hey.
Me: Hey Mom. Look, are you guys close?
Mom: No. We’re…I don’t know. Maybe 40 minutes, an hour.
Me: Shit. I left my keys when I left the house.
Mom: Well, you’ll have to wait. We’re in a jam. Very heavy rain here.
Me: Yeah, same here. Look nevermind, I’ll just wait here.
Mom: Ok.

(Ends call. Sighs. Turns wiper off. Notices stupid dog is approaching car.)


(Dog sits next to car, upright and proud. He just looks ahead and the rain is just soaking him.)

Stupid fucking…

(Dog just looks ahead. Rain gets heavier. Something happens and I, I dunno. I don’t know what happened. Anyway, I open the door.)

Come here.
Come HERE you stupid fucking-

(Dumb and deaf stupid fucking dog looks straight ahead. I’m getting wet, holding the door open so I fucking slam it. Sighs. Grabs umbrella.)

You’re a deaf dumb fucking-

(Dog doesn’t even move. Dog is made of stone or something.
Walks over to dog. Shelters dog with umbrella. Shoes get wet in like two seconds.)


(Waits in the rain with dog. Ungrateful dumb fucking dog just stares straight ahead.)